Don't give up

I want to start with one of my favorite statements of faith.

"Anyway"

People are often unreasonable, illogical and self centered;
Forgive them anyway.
If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives;
Be kind anyway.
If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies;
Succeed anyway.
If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you;
Be honest and frank anyway.
What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight;
Build anyway.
If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous;
Be happy anyway.
The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow;
Do good anyway.
Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough;
Give the world the best you've got anyway.
You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and your God;
It was never between you and them anyway.

-Bd. Mother Teresa of Calcutta

Detachment is a virtue that in the 21st century is misunderstood and seriously undervalued. The word itself is problematic, sounding too much like “detached”….checked-out, bored, impersonal, distant. But the virtue of detachment is anything but.

Detachment helps us get at the “why” question. Why do good? Why persevere? Why hope? Why love? And detachment purifies intentions as well, helping us see our own unfinished business: pride, dependency on the approval of others, control, and unrealistic expectations about how life and people SHOULD be.

Easier said then done! From an early age we are taught about the importance of justice, of fairness. And in a JUST world, things would be fair. People would be nice to you when you were nice to them. People would be generous with you when you were generous with them. People would be truthful with you when you were truthful with them. But of course life isn’t fair. People are not always nice, generous, truthful. We know this, and yet the fantasy is so hard to give up. If I just try harder, people will do the right thing. Sometimes. Just enough to keep you hooked into the false belief that your effort at goodness is enough to make everything fair.

It’s not. And that’s o.k. In fact it’s better than o.k., it's necessary. Because as Blessed Teresa of Calcutta reminds us IT ISN’T ABOUT YOU AND THEM in the end. It’s about you and your Creator. It’s about you becoming the person you were meant to be. It’s about you growing up.

Let go, detach….NOT from people, but from illusions about people, NOT from this world, but from illusions about this world, and NOT from the struggle to be good, but from illusions about the magical power of goodness.

Your daily efforts to make the world a better place, however big or small, matter more than you know. Humans being human doesn’t change this truth one iota. Detach from all that needs to be given up, but don’t give up.